The unemployed's survival guide!
If you've ever experienced unemployment, then you know what a roller coaster ride it can be. Here's a hilarious book that recognizes the trials and tribulations of the unemployed, and for what unemployment invevitably creates...
Slovenly Lazy, Unemployed Grownups
...otherwise known as
SLUGs!
Introducing...
The Book for SLUGs
|
|
A MUST-READ FOR ANYONE STRUGGLING THROUGH UNEMPLOYMENT!!!
Sure, being unemployed can be wonderful – no more alarm clocks; no need to shave; no worries about forgetting the deodorant; no pantyhose or suit and tie; no more condescending bosses; and no more lousy long commutes.
No job, no schedules to keep, and no deadlines to meet also puts you on the fast track to becoming a Slovenly Lazy Unemployed Grownup!
The Book for SLUGs: An Unemployment Survival and Coping Guide
If you are unemployed or know someone who is, then this book is a must-read. Disclaimer: This book will NOT provide you with any job search strategies, will NOT teach you how to write a smashing cover letter, will NOT give you helpful action verbs to improve your resume, and most of all, will most certainly NOT show you what color your parachute is!
So what WILL you get out of this book? Here are some highlights:
- SLUG-O-Meter. Take the quiz and find out how much unemployment has beaten you down. Hey, if you don't complete the quiz, congratulations - you've aced it, you are a true SLUG for not being able to complete even a simple task!
- SLUG Novelty Items. For example: SLUG Car - no gas, no tires, since you are not going anywhere anyway. SLUG Coffee - no caffeine, don't want to get too wired... doing nothing. SLUG T-Shirt - already has holes and stains, perfect for vegging on the couch for hours on end.
- Top Ten BEST Things About Being a SLUG:
10 | Able to shop during a weekday, and find parking almost as good as the handicapped. |
9 | Can stay in pajamas and bunny slippers all day. |
8 | Don’t have to shower till good and ready… which sometimes isn’t till 10pm. |
7 | Don’t have to sneak to go online, no longer have to quickly toggle from Internet game site back to impressive work-related spreadsheet document. |
6 | ….Read the book to find out what’s on the rest of the list! |
Well, life as a SLUG was great… for a moment anyway, until you realized pretty quickly that life without a job also means life without INCOME!
You find that not having an income is a real downer because you really can’t do much, you can’t drive anywhere because you can’t afford gas, and even if you could, you can’t buy anything once you get there. You find out that you’re not even wanted at your local Starbucks because you can’t really afford three bucks for coffee with a fancy name, just to gain the privilege of hanging out there.
- Top Ten WORST Things About Being a SLUG:
10 | No money – worried about how next month’s cable bill will get paid. |
9 | Have to do housework and laundry – no excuses. |
8 | No money – can’t buy stuff or go shopping to help keep mind off of being a SLUG, gotta stay on budget. |
7 | Have to cash in coins collected in piggy banks, jars and from under the sofa cushions. |
6 | No money – can’t go on vacation to get away from the SLUG rut. |
….Read the book to find out what’s on the rest of the list!
Look on the bright side, you are not alone, there are literally millions of SLUGs out there! And here’s more good news: Being a SLUG is just temporary (eventually you WILL land a job) – not like being annoying, which is forever… those annoying ex-bosses and ex-coworkers will always be annoying.
Just to help jumpstart your way to improving your SLUG condition, here are some creative solutions:
Learn Hindi or Mandarin, then relocate to India or Beijing and apply for your old job. |
Learn a more marketable job skill. Here are some suggestions: Air conditioning and refrigeration; Pet groomer; Massage therapist. |
Go online and sign up for a scam school and get a bogus degree, just to boost your ego. |
Take acting classes so you can at least pretend not to be a loser. |
…Find out more creative solutions when you read the book! |
Lots more SLUGs “words of wisdom” can be found in The Book for SLUGs, which recognizes the trials and tribulations of the unemployed and for what unemployment inevitably creates… Slovenly, Lazy, Unemployed Grownups. Being unemployed is not easy and sometimes it just helps to get a perspective from the lighter side. The Book for SLUGs can be just the pick-me-up that’ll boost a depressed SLUG’s spirits. The book is in color, fully illustrated, and includes lots of funny quotes and inspirational sayings.
Here's the Table of Contents... recognize yourself in any of the accompanying pictures?
|
| Get your copy of The Book for SLUGs, the unemployed person's survival guide! |
Finally some good news for the unemployed...
SPECIAL UNEMPLOYED BUDGET PRICE:
Just 98 cents!
Cheaper than an itunes song!
Why download an itunes song that will depress you with its lyrics of
heartbreak and loss when you can get this hilariously funny book that
will keep you laughing for hours on end!
Buy the Ebook and receive a copy instantly! Only 98 cents!! | Or, receive a copy by mail $6.99 (plus shipping and handling) |
